Since Kevin’s such a big shot, he got to tell Puck Daddy five reasons he loves hockey. I figured I should take a stab at a list of my own.  I ended up writing well over 1500 words and had more than 5 reasons. While this is fine on its own, I think it’s a bit much to ask of readers (especially since “Ice girls” isn’t one of my reasons.) I didn’t put them in any sort of order, but here goes: LD’s “Why I Love Hockey: A Multi-part Series”

1: There’s always action: (that’s what she said)

Somwhere right now Ottawa Senators GM Bryan Murray is petting a black cat and cackling. After a long summer of torturing Dany Heatley and holding him in Murray's own personal purgatory, Heats was finally traded. But there's a catch. There's always a catch. I imagine the phone call went something like this:

*Phone rings at CJ's Gentleman's Club*

Front desk staff: Hello?

Bryan Murray: Hi, is Dany Heatley there?

Front desk staff: Umm... Why, yes he is. One moment. May I ask who is calling?

Bryan Murray: Tell him it's Daddy.

*Girls, Girls, Girls by Motley Crue is the hold music*

Dany Heatley: Hi, Douchebag.

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[Patrick O'Sullivan trudges through the snow]

PO: Hey Ethan. Whatcha doin'?

Ethan Moreau: Lookin' fer polar bears

PO: Oh... Why?

EM: It's m'job.

PO: I thought you were a hockey player!

EM: I'm the captain. Gotta look fer polar bear.

PO: But why Ethan? Shouldn't we be at the rink playin' hockey? It's awful cold and snowy. Must be hockey season.

EM: This is Edmonton, son. It's barely below 0. I reckon it's only September. Gotta keep watchin' fer polar bear.

PO: Oh....  Ethan, why you gotta watch for polar bear?

EM: Thems dangerous creatures, polar bear. I'm the captain, and I have to protect my team. One of them polar bear almost ate Ales Hemsky last year.

PO: Wow! What else does the captain have to do, Ethan?

EM: Protect th' team from ruffians, referees 'n' polar bears. Make sure the fellas are giving 110%. Monitor the rebuilding of the Death Star. Attend public functions at schools, malls and city halls.

PO: D'ya need any help, Ethan?

EM: No, Patrick, I'll be all right. I reckon training camp is startin' soon. You better run back and sharpen your skates.

PO: But I can stay here and keep you company!

EM: It's all right. I reckon I've been on polar bear watch for a while now and I can keep on watching til the season starts. Run along now.

[Patrick O'Sullivan backs away slowly with tears welling up. Ethan Moreau continues to stand vigilant, looking for bears]

Today, dear readers, I found something wonderful on TSN.ca! At first I thought it was a joke or some kinda of archived footage but no... There are fresh, brand new hockey highlights on Canada's Sports Leader! It's the first sighting of a season showing that hockey highlight hunting season is almost upon us.

(OK, so it's a game between the Bruins and Leafs rookies but it's something. At this point I'll take anything.)

TSN (ESPN if it was Canadian and cared about hockey) is revealing their season preview capsules team by team every day through October 1st. The started on the 1st, as you might expect, and it is now the 4th. Everyone at BMR is stunned (Stunned!) that the Islanders didn't show up on the 1st (that was the wobegone Phoenix Coyotes). They didn't even appear on the 2nd! That was the Sakicless Colorado Avalanche. The Islanders are only the third worst team in the NHL, according to TSN. These are the halcyon days, Long Islanders.  Heady times.

(PS 2 zambonis in one day!)

If you've lived in New York for any significant length of time (or any big, big city I guess) you're probably accustomed to seeing all kinds of different things, people and odd happenings. So, sites like PeopleofWalmart.com that have pictures of all kinds of, um, different folks shouldn't really shock and awe you. Chances are you've seen any number of those people on your way to work or the local grocery.

As such, when I heard about Alex Ovechkin driving a Zamboni down 6th Avenue next week, I yawned. It's a great idea and in any other city it would certainly capture a lot of attention. I mean, how often do you see a Zam driving down a city street in September? OK, let me rephrase that. How often do you see that outside of Canada or Minnesota? Never. But in New York, it will get looked over as if it was another cabbie honking a horn. Maybe if Ovechkin does it nude and has a megaphone, it would capture some attention. Or if he was having a three-some with Alex Rodriguez and Elliot Spitzer's hooker while naked on the Zamboni with a megaphone. Now that -- that would be front page news.

(And yes, I'm kidding. This should be pretty cool, but I'm sure it won't get attention from any NY media outlet.)